Equilibrium?
Yesterday I had such a wonderful, life affirming sort of day, so I suppose it makes sense that today should be entirely lacking in fun. I have actually always hated Sundays because there is always that Monday morning threat. Today I woke up bright and early and went to the gym which was a promising start to the day. In fact I was feeling so jazzed after the work out that I went by Lowe's and bought a festive plant. I am determined to buy a container plant each week so that by midsummer the pool is surrounded with beautiful color.
When I returned home I fell into the trap that often haappens when E has abandoned me--I begin to clean. Thus far i have vacuumed, steam cleaned, swept, scrubbed the floor on hands and knees, cleaned all the bathrooms, scrubbed soap scum off the shower doors, dusted, cleaned the pool, tested the water, added chemicals, and I even organized all of the plastic bags under the sink in the kitchen. My hands feel like they've been pickled. The worst part is that E is still nowhere near coming home. Could mopping be too far off?

Get Your Kicks
What on God's green earth would possess me to get up at 6 on a Saturday?I can only 1) plead insanity and 2) say that it's time for the annual CKS 5K which I have foolishly agreed to run. I've been practicing for months, and now that the final day has arrived, I've lost my shorts. Literally. They have disappeared into the abyss of my closet, apparently never to be seen again. I will be the only one racing in yoga pants. It give me character?
Secondly, after long debate, many peeks at the bank account to see if it magically grew, and about a million visits to travel sites, E and I have finally planned our summer vacation. We're going old school--a 9 day tour of Route 66. Oh yeah, Cadillac Ranch, giant dinosaurs, rattlesnake museums, diners, the Flamingo Motel, natural beauty; it's going to be a wild ride. We're going to shoot up to Oklahoma City and catch the road there, then go across the Texas panhandle and all the way across New Mexico to Gallup, then we'll dip down into Arizona to see the Petrified Forest before returning to Texas by way of Roswell and perhaps Carlsbad. If anyone has any must see roadside attractions, post in comments. I'd better lose weight now, because I am going to be eating a lot of pie. I can almost taste it now!
I'd better stretch and boogie.

Curtain Call
After weeks of preparation the curtains went up for the big production. My students were perfect, the timing was stellar, the props looked good, and the entire thing went off without a hitch. I was walking on air. The students even banded together to get me flowers--my entire table is covered in roses and tulips. It was worth all of the madness, effort, and hours, but I am so happy to have my life back. I haven't been to the gym all week, and I feel a little like I'm falling apart, but hopefully tomorrow I will get my butt back in gear.
Perhaps at long last dishes will get washed, laundry put away, dinners made, papers graded, and I just might make the "D"s.

One thing I refuse to do is pick up the poop Toby left me today. That's all about Eric.

Tasty

It is not very often that one has the opportunity to sample cuisine cooked over an old toilet. Indeed it is probably even rarer to see a toilet grill explode. Such are the rare twists of fate that occur at a bad taste party. The levels of awfulness that we plumbed are really quite astonishing. It also made for the best time I've had in awhile.

The pictures are not for the weak of heart!

2+2
Today I have done both my two favorite and two least favorite things in the world.
We had to get up early because I had a school function to go to, but the afternoon has been all mine.
I began with a fave--a good work out. I even improved my mile time to 8:50. To anyone remotely serious about running this is really slow and lame, but as I started at about 14 minutes per mile, I consider any improvement a good deal. I also have begun doing boy style push-ups which makes me feel all macho (or whatever the word is for a pumped up girlie).
On my way home I had to do things I've been putting off for a long time--at one fell swoop I had to shop for shorts (yikes), bras (furstrating), and bathingsuits (double yikes). Still, I persevered and after only 5 trips to the dressing room, I left having successfully achieved my goal. The world should rest easy knowing that I now have an undergarment that A) fits and B) does not cause horrific irritation and rash. Actually the world will now rest a little easier since I have stopped talking about my undergarment situation.
My reward for such dreadful mirror experiences is I spent the afternoon in the pool. It was still a little cold (as in I had goose bumps), but it builds character. Right? Now my body is deliciously sun kissed, tired and happy.
I'm watching 1,000 Places to See Before You Die, and I'm so jealous of these people. I want to have the money to tour the world. Failing that, I would like a corporate sponsor. Perhaps I can get the Oxford Dictionary to sponsor my trek with the understanding that I would 1) continue writing about my dictionary reading, and 2) research new word usages for them. OED, I'm waiting for your call! Speaking of dictionary, I have roughly 22 pages of C's left--it's been a difficult push, but at least I now know that at 7:30 tonight I will admire the crepuscular sky. Look it up.

Lord What Fools These Mortals Be
I've been running around like a fool all week, and I really don't have much to show for it. I've lost the ability to form sentences, so don't expect eloquence.
The play is next week, and we've been in full attack mode with practice every day after school. By the time I finish there, work out, and drive home I am pretty much a waste of air. I keep meaning to do work either on papers or around the house, but I end up just sitting here on the couch, watching tv and playing on my computer. I am so utterly boring.
I am still plugging my way through the dictionary and have reached a tasty treat: crepe suzette. Only 1650 more pages to go! It's not as encouraging when I think of it that way.
I've been sitting here for the past few minutes trying to put together something remotely interesting to say, but that might have to wait for next week when things settle down. I do so miss my mind. There are many things in this world that are overrated, mental faculities are not.

Notes in Chaos
Although I could go on for screens and screens, I have time for no such self-indulgent behavior. Strictly the short version:
1)Items in my classroom: 4 set of fairy wings, 2 swords, 1 lanter, 1 stuffed dogs, 1 donkey head with matching tail, 52 leaves, a million ungraded papers, 7 messages to call parents back, and, for some reason, a recipe for kitty cakes. In othe words the play is going well, everything else has fallen away.
2) What are you doing mid September? E and I are hitting ACL, just bought tickets today.
3) I love my husband, and I've enjoyed calling him that for the last 3 years. In fact I am not going to sit here professing my love, I'm going to kiss that boy and take him out to dinner.

Coda: Ah, Hubris
In my last post I went on and on about feeling youthful and alive. I should have known better. I just went to the grocery store and popped my hip out of joint while trying to push a cart. Yes, folks, I have a grevious cart injury. Who's old now?

The Road Goes on Forever
Despite the complete suckiness of I-35, we had a perfectly lovely road trip to Austin. Usually I come back feeling drained, but this time I feel positive and happy. I am both happy to have such awesome people I care for there but I am also happy to come back home to a place I feel satisfied.
We left in a dreadful storm, not knowing if we would have a roof to return to when we got back home. Luckily there is no visible damage. Saturday we hung out with Eric's parents and siblings which was nice. I am obsessed with their poodle Daisy. I can scarcely admit this to myself becuase I really do have some sort of prejudice against fluffy dogs. Still I guess they are not all like Toby. E and I spent almost 2 hours at Goodwill trying to find the perfect outfits for a bad taste party next weekend. I tried on everything from a leather skirt to a day glow tennis outfit before setting on the worst outfit ever--a camo mini skirt and blue mesh 80s shirt. I just need some white cowboy boots to complete the look. Because he is the most tolerant husband ever, Eric is letting me dress him up as Magnum P.I. for the party--complete with short shorts! He's stopped shaving in an attempt to recreate the mustache! Yes, he really must love me!
After we got to spend the rest of our time with friends. We saw the Quarles' although too briefly, then it was off to a really faboo dinner. It was so nice to reconnect with everyone, and I left feeling fantastic. We then met up with Pete, his new girl, Tyra and Tico at Opal Divine's which was a perfect place to hang out. We had an entire room of the bar to ourselves, complete with our own bar tender. Despite the fact that I am not drinking now, I had an amazing night, especially since my sister and Jay dropped by. I haven't stayed out at the bar that late in a while, and I really enjoy that feeling of being young and alive every once in awhile. I firmly endeavor to stop feeling to tired all the time and start actually living my life.
This morning the merriment continued as we went for Dim Sum with Pete, Nino, Christi and the girls. I knew I was with the people I adore when we all burst into song and weren't embarrassed at all. Perhaps that is the mark of friendship--belting out Peter Paul and Mary in the middle of a Chinese restaurant.
I expected a stress filled weekend and ended up feeling rejuvinated.
Here's a shout out to waking up.

Beginnings of a Creedo
As I waited for Eric to come to bed last night, I ran over a few possible assignments for my 8th grade poetry class. I wanted to come up with something that encapsulated who they are, who they want to be, and what values they carry with them at this point in thier lives. What I kept thinking back on was the scene in Bull Durham when Kevin Costner tells Susan Sarandon exactly what he believes in:Well, I believe in the soul.
The cock.
The pussy.
The small of a woman's back.
The hanging curveball.
High fiber.
Good scotch.
That the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap.
I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone.
I believe there ought to be a Constitution Amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter.
I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas eve.
And I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days... Goodnight.

Obviously I am not going to give them this specific passage, but I like the idea. Anyway, I thought in preparation, I would begin thinking about my credo.

I believe starting the morning without coffee is some sort of sin.
I believe the the color blue is purest when glanced through the leaves of towering oaks.
I believe in the power of even the thinnest smile
in the peace that comes from walking in the park alone
in the beauty of a Rothko painting, the music of Ella Fitzgerald, and the last chapter of Melville's Moby Dick--and I alone escaped to tell thee.
I believe in the transcendent power of choral music--the majesty of Handel's "Alleluia Chorus" and Beethoven's "Ode to Joy"
I believe in love at first sight,
in waking up next to the same person every morning,
In linking arms and in rediscovering someone's face each day.
I believe in the healing power of macaroni and cheese
I believe singing in the car is normal,
Skipping is necessary at least once a year,
Second guessing is dangerous,
Running frees the mind,
Drinking the right glass of wine lubricates the soul,
and petting a cat doubles as therapy.
I believe teaching completes me.
I believe the right book has the power to transport the spirit.
I want to believe that love guides everything I do
and I believe God is good, all the time.


So tell me, what do you believe in?

Never Trust a Pom
http://photos14.flickr.com/13931144_01076c8c74_m.jpg

By the Numbers
1) I have lowered my 5k time to 28 minutes and 14 seconds--not only that but I managed to get through it without once grabbing on the handles for dear life. It's not much of an accomplishment, but considering it used to take me over 45 minutes to run, I"ll take the validation where I can get it.
2) I have officially lost 82 pounds since being at my most heavy. It's taken many years, but I am digging the new found control of my life. As one of my coworkers said, I've lost a 6th grader! (actually there are several 6th graders I wouldn't mind losing)
3) I graded over 150 papers this afternoon and got myself caught up--or at least relatively caught up. It's funny, my best day of vacation is always the one where I end up going in to work. Pretty telling, but I don't care. At least I know the nature of my nuttiness.
4) Despite my best efforts to convince the powers that be that we need to start school later, I have to go back to my rise at 5 schedule tomorrow. I truly believe I can teach better after 2 cups of coffee and my daily Magnum P.I. dose. Really.
5)Toby is still at the groomers. Before Eric gets back without him, I am going to run in and out of the house 10 times without him barking. I deserve it.
6) This has no numbers, but before I begin running in and out, I have to lodge my grievous complaint about rice cakes that fall apart. It's just not right.

Peep Show (washingtonpost.com)

Peep Show (washingtonpost.com)
This is the only good use for Peeps that I have ever seen.

Eggs, Bunnies, and Stuff
Despite near frigid temps, we had a perfectly lovely Easter at Jen and Jay's place. http://picasaweb.google.com/ebresie/Easter2007
Today I've enjoyed playing. Mom and I hit the outlets in Allen, and I now own some skirts that actually fit. It beats showing up to work nekkid. The Catholic schools really frown on that sort of thing. Go figure.
I have tomorrow off too, but it's time to go back to work. I'm no good at this stay at home crap. Case in point, I"m currently watching MTV Cribs. Sadness.

Snow Falling on Oaks
Eric and I were just enjoying breakfast at one of our favorite haunts (sweet potato pancakes!) when I noticed that Eric had suddenly stopped paying attention to me. He did a strange double take, grunted and pointed out the window. Following his gaze, I saw a wondrous sight: snow falling in April. Granted it was only a little flurry and did not last more than a few moments, but still, dang!

Lurk
Toby and I have just returned from a lovely walk around the lake and through the woods. I was once again reminded of how much I really enjoy living here. As we meandered the trail, I was struck again and again by the fact that this natural beauty is just a few steps away from my house. I need to vow to take advantage of it more often. I began our walk thinking about all the annoying day of day garbage, and within just a few minutes I stopped the crap and simply took the time to look around me, to listen to the birds calling and the trees swaying in the breeze. Heck, the walk even made me appreciate the dog's companionship. (There must be something wrong with me).
The goal for the day is to go work out, hit the pool place to get some chemicals, buy an Easter dress, and go by Lowe's for some new plants to make our yard springy. I might even frolic. You never know.

Pommeranians in the Afternoon
I just don't think I'm capable of dealing with Toby for more than the requisite 3 hours in the evening. I just got home, and I am already itching to leave again.
Unfortunatley I have to wait for the pool people to come fix our cleaner before I can run to the gym.
The bonus of Catholic schools is the really nice Easter break. I'm off until Wednesday with no other plans than to work out, swim, watch CSI reruns and drink coffee in my pjs. (And after Friday afternoon I have no idea what's I'll do)
The other bit of good new I have is that I got a really nice raise. It's not much, but it will make a difference. Plus even more than the money, I know that someone on the board must like me.
I met Jen for lunch, and then we tried on her wedding dress. Beautiful!!! We were getting teary eyed in the dressing room. She's going to make a lovely bride. I can't wait for the wedding--6 months from tomorrow.
I'm going to go chase Toby around the block. Maybe I can give him another stroke.

YouTube - Alanis Morissette "My Humps" video

YouTube - Alanis Morissette "My Humps" video
To say that this has been a trying day would be rather like saying the wicked witch was only slightly ornery. Still the above video does a little to lighten my mood.

I committed the cardinal sin of teaching--I completely lost it and said some really stupid things which I only do when I feel my back is against the wall. As a result I have spent the rest of my day/evening playing things over and over and over to that point that I am losing my mind. Not a very helpful technique but it's what I do. I analyze everything to death. Is taht part of my charm?

I also did not lose as much body fat as i would have liked, so I remain a little at a loss. I am not quite sure how to exercise more or to eat less without being unhealthy.

Now our television is broken and I'm missing house.

Yeah, the video is not that good.

Still I have to keep telling myself that tomorrow is always better. That philosophy seldom steers me wrong. Now I must go--I have several more hours of agonizing analysis of every moment of the day left to get through tonight.

Certifiable
Just a side note: I just got word that after a very long process I just received word that my teacher's certificate has finally gone through. I feel like a ridiculously long chapter of my life has closed even if the actual certificate means very little to me in my current career.

Pencils Up
It's amazing what a tiny piece of fabric can do. Since my shorts fell off yesterday, Eric agreed that I should do some shopping. I got a cure little white denim pencil skirt in a deliciously small size. I had 8 people compliment me today, and I felt like walking on air. I have reach my 80th pound lost in this whole process. Even more shockingly, I just bought my first size small. The very idea that I could be a size small is mind blowing to me. I feel like a new person.
It's a good thing I cam feeling so good because I've actually had the day from hell. The alarm clock did not go off, I ran late all morning, had no break, directed play practice and sweated my bootie off at the gym. Yep. I owe Levi Strauss a lot.